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"Those who plant in tears, will harvest with shouts of joy." Psalm 126:5
I started with Scripture because the Word of God is alive, and as long as I am here, it needs to be where I begin. Also, this blog is for me, not just about me. With brain fog and all of the distraction in life, my goal is to chronicle my journey through both the suffering and healing God has for me.
I was listening to a sermon recently that set me on my heels. I've been struggling with chronic illness for about a decade and have been wholly consumed with my pain and illness even when I thought I was focused on Christ, my family, and work. Pastor Michael Easley (who has suffered from chronic pain for years) stated: "When your problem or pain is the most important thing in your life, you are out of focus". I am out of focus. I am distractible. Pain hits, fatigue sets in, my airway starts to constrict, and even if standing in the place God's called me to be, my focus isn't on Christ. Satan can take a circumstance that seems physical, and use it to steal my focus on the spiritual. Time to stop, recalibrate, and move forward.
Today my distractions are:
fatigue-6
stomach upset-3
head to toe pain-4
(scale from 1 to 10)
My accomplishments are:
time with my family
grocery shopping
dinner in the works
blog started
progress on friend's baby shower
What I missed: reading my bible. working the bible study book I'm working on.
What God's teaching me:
Refocus.
Love more
Instead of always asking God to change circumstances and people that are difficult, I need to ask him to change my heart.
Remember healing
Lord, I ask your forgiveness for my sin and distraction. I pray you do something HUGE in my health and my walk with you with this little blog. I pray you take it and remind me that you have already attained the victory, that I should consider my pain in the light of eternity and not survive but thrive through you. I pray for a heart like Paul, to serve through any situation. I pray to learn more and more about you each time I sit down to write. I pray that if there is anyone else who needs to read these words, you lead them here. In Jesus name, Amen!
